Eighteenth Sunday After Pentecost
October 4, 2009
Homily for the Anglican Usage Mass
of the
St. Thomas More Society
celebrated at
St. Anthony of Padua Roman Catholic Church , 1013 Wood Street
Scranton, PA
Mark 10:2-16
In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen
When our late Holy Father Pope John Paul II wrote his landmark work on human sexuality, The Theology of the Body, he based it on the incident from the Gospels that we heard this morning. He used the passage from Matthew, and we just heard it from Mark. Starting in 1979 and ending in 1984 he used his weekly Wednesday audiences to explain the meaning of this passage, later compiling all the addresses into one volume. At any rate, the reason he built his entire work from this incident is that it includes the Church’s entire theology of marriage in one short passage. Thus, today, on Respect Life Sunday, I will discuss the characteristics of a healthy marriage and how these tend towards a respect for the gift of human life.
The first characteristic of Catholic marriage is exclusivity. I am not sure that Jesus ever heard the term “serial monogamy”, but it was this practice that the Pharisees wanted to justify. So the Gospel makes clear under Jewish Law that a husband could dismiss his wife unilaterally, something akin to our “no fault” divorce laws, though the women of that time did not have the same privilege. This law undermined the exclusive nature of the marriage bond because while a man might not literally commit adultery, he did so in his heart and in spirit by dismissing the old wife for a new model. Under the letter of the law, each relationship was exclusive, but a new relationship easily could be found as long as the previous one ended first.
Jesus said, “No!” That’s nothing but adultery by a different name, because, as He points out by reminding us of the passage from Genesis, “from the beginning of creation” God intended not only that marriage be exclusive, He also intended the second characteristic of marriage. Before the fall, from the beginning, God desired that the marriage be indissoluble, a bond unable to be broken. The only way marriage can be truly exclusive, in spirit as well as in fact, is if the marriage cannot be ended at will. Here Jesus invokes divine Providence in the formation of marital unions by saying, “What God has joined together, let not man put asunder.” Jesus is telling us that God plays a role in the formation of every true marital union. It is God’s will that men and women be married and that the union He has formed be permanent, that each couple be truly one until death do them part.
To drive home the indissoluble nature of marriage, Jesus tells the disciples that marriages formed after divorce are, in fact, adulterous. Though a man may possess a certificate that says he is divorced, he is, in fact, still married to his wife and she to him.
What Jesus shows here is that exclusivity and indissolubility are inextricably linked. Only if a couple knows their bond cannot be broken before the bond is even formed—only these couples will be truly committed to only each other. This must be covered in pre-Cana marriage preparation classes, because belief in exclusivity and indissolubility is required of all couples being married in the Church. However, if one may obtain an easy divorce, then the bond is not really exclusive, for the parties hold out the option that someone “better” may eventually come along. Jesus did not call it serial monogamy, but He knew exactly what it was, and He taught explicitly that it is not God’s will.
Once a couple knows that the exclusivity of their bond to each other is based on the indissolubility of their marital union, they can take responsibility for each other—they can truly become one flesh. Exclusivity based on indissolubility expels competition between the man and his wife, for they no longer live in suspicion that the other shortly will leave. On this foundation the complementary nature of man and woman can express itself in the total gift of self that is characteristic of Catholic marriage. Rather than competing with one another, the spouses can help each other. Rather than treating one’s spouse as a potential curse, the couple sees in each other an incredible and irreplaceable blessing. Rather than seeing one’s spouse as an unbearable burden, a trial to be endured, married people can see their beloved as a precious gift, a vessel of grace to be cherished. What I have just described is the unitive aspect of a Catholic marriage, the third characteristic of a Catholic marriage, and the orientation that tends towards a holistic union, one that is emotional and spiritual, as well as physical.
A union of this sort will naturally not exclude children, but will welcome them. Thus, the fourth and final characteristic of a Catholic marriage is that it is procreative. The total gift of self that I described a few minutes ago cannot intentionally exclude children. One cannot offer himself to his bride and withhold his fertility. A woman cannot offer herself to her husband and withhold her fertility, if she desires they truly be one. Jesus’ assumption that marriage is necessarily procreative is reflected in the discourse that follows about exclusivity, indissolubility and unity in marriage. Incredibly, this part of the passage about children is optional and can be left out of the Sunday lectionary, but in no Catholic church should it be.
You see, children are the natural fruit of the marital virtues of exclusivity, indissolubility and unity, and Jesus wants the children for His own. It is thus no accident that the discourse on children follows immediately the discourse on marriage. Jesus intended these discussions to come together, and St. Mark recorded it faithfully. Jesus says, “Let the children come to me; do not hinder them.” To remove exclusivity by reducing indissolubility harms unity and therefore hinders procreativity. If marriages, in other words, are not faithful, strong and permanent, children will not be born – we will hinder the children coming to Jesus.
Sociological research bears out what Jesus taught almost 2,000 years ago. As our nation’s divorce rate began to climb with the advent of widespread contraceptive use and no fault divorce, the birth rate began to decline. Our birthrate is half of what it was just fifty years ago. The average woman in 1958 bore four children in her lifetime. Today the average woman bears only two. Where there are unstable or broken marriages, children are not born. In unstable and broken marriages, children are not seen as blessings of inestimable value, but as competitors for scarce resources, burdens that struggling people and struggling relationships cannot afford. Listen to how people talk about children, and you can tell whether their marriage is broken or unstable.
Jesus’ point is that if we get marriage right, then children will be welcomed and respected. If we treat marriage like the Pharisees did, as something that can be dissolved at will, then children will be excluded, pushed away as an encumbrance to the individual’s fulfillment of his selfish desires. The implication of Jesus’ teaching on marriage is this: if we follow what He taught, we will bring Him children. If we do not observe our Lord’s wisdom, we will not bring Him children. To be faithful to the command that Jesus gives us about the children, we must be faithful to his teaching on marriage.
The scourge of abortion, in other words, is grounded in weak – or non-existent – marriages. It is said that abortion destroys marriage, and this is true. But Jesus teaches us here that marriage can destroy abortion. When we recover our appreciation for the exclusive and indissoluble nature of marriage, we will be able to form strong unions, and if we are able to form strong unions, we will never view children in the manner that makes them vulnerable to the abortionist’s brutality. We will see them for what they are, precious gifts of inestimable value, made in the image of God, people for whom Christ died because of His great love for them.
And seeing them in the right way we will receive more of them. Indeed, we will not hinder the children coming to Jesus. Rather we’ll be faithful to His command that we let the children come to Him. Pray, then, that by the power of God’s love Catholic marriages everywhere will be strengthened, in order that Holy Mother Church can demonstrate to the world what faithfulness to Jesus and the Gospel of Life looks like – unity grounded in exclusivity and indissolubility issuing in families that let the little children come to Jesus.